Picture: Half Moon Bay, California by Kyla Alexandre
I would say that I am a fairly positive person, but how? Life naturally has its ups and downs, so how can one go through all of that and still be positive? Well, that is what I am going to talk about today.
There is a misconception that living a positive lifestyle means you are happy all the time, which I can say is not always true. Living a positive lifestyle means understanding that even when life turns to poop, you still see it through and know it will get better, or finding the good in every situation.
Let’s talk about maintaining a positive lifestyle.
The first point I am going to make is the hardest one to follow: do not stress about things you cannot control. Once you figure this out, you will already feel a whole lot more happier and positive. This is something that I have figured out in the past year or so. Every day, we experience so many different things, good, bad, or in the middle, and the issue that a lot of us have is our inability to shake those bad things and therefore giving us the perception that the whole day was bad. This is where I advise being in tune with yourself, meaning you have the ability to check-in with yourself. With that, you can ask yourself: is this bad thing that only took up “x” amount of time worth perseverating over the entire day? Most of the time the answer is no. And most of the time, these things are out of your control anyway. You may not be able to control the event, but you can control how you react.
Living positively is mostly about reactions. It is how you react to events in your life. For example, let’s say you have a meltdown (this happens more than I would like to admit). You get all of that negativity out of your system, but then instead of dwelling on it, you be proactive and try to resolve the issue or implement new changes that will ease your distress and make you feel a lot better. This shows a few things, 1) you are controlling your reaction 2) you recognize there is something to look forward to (light at the end of the tunnel) 3) you are proactive post a negative reaction.
Dwelling on something too long leads to a negative spiral, but that does not mean that you shouldn’t dwell on something. You should fixate on something long enough to get it out of your system, sometimes it’s a few minutes, sometimes it’s a few hours because holding in/suppressing feelings is never a good thing, but you need to find that balance between over dwelling and under dwelling.
Second, find the good in everything. There is always something good that comes out of every part of your life no matter how crappy it may seem. It is whether you learn something from it, or experience something good or rewarding, always try to find the light in everything. It’s simple, you just have to let go and allow yourself to find the good.
This next one makes a huge difference, especially when times are rough: practice gratitude daily. Every single day, when you wake up tell yourself or write down 3-5 things you are grateful for (you can always do more if you please). Telling yourself what you are grateful for acts as a reminder for all of the good things you have in your life, despite all of the negative things you could be surrounded by. Practicing gratitude is so important because it reconnects you to a happier state of mind, therefore being more positive. Writing them on something you can carry with you to glance at throughout the day is also a great practice because you have those reminders wherever you go.
Cut out negative energy. I touch on this a little deeper in a post about cutting out others negative energy, but the same idea applies to every part of your life. Let go of what no longer serves you, holds you back, or makes you feel bad and unhappy. You only live one life, you should not have to spend it living with things you do not like.
Do things that bring in positive energy. I mentioned a few posts ago a page in your journal full of a list of things that make you happy. Keep that accessible. Surround yourself with music, movies, TV shows, people, etc that make you feel good and happy.
I hope this inspires you to be more positive. If you turn the things I mentioned above into habits, your life will surely head in a more positive direction. Don’t forget to stay vibin!
Where you can reach me:
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